Sexual Assault Help

大学为许多学生提供了一个探索与随意伴侣或认真关系的亲密关系的环境. In the confines of these relationships, however, 没有经验的伴侣可能没有识别麻烦行为所需的工具和经验. The earliest expressions of abuse aren’t always physical. 控制习惯可以从操纵性的评论或愤怒的爆发开始，无论是当面还是在电话里, text or social media.

对于年轻人来说，能够识别出问题关系的警告信号是极其重要的, before an abusive situation escalates. The most common indicators of high-risk emotional or physical abuse are below:

Emotional Abuse

• Tone: 如果你的伴侣使用轻蔑或攻击性的语气，看似无害的话可能会变成威胁或侮辱.
• Language choice: 伴侣责备你，或者在和你说话的时候说一些粗俗的话，比如脏话.
• Jealousy: Your partner seems suspicious of your interactions with other people. Your partner attempts to control your interactions, isolate you, or monitor your communications with others.
• Controlling statements: Your partner issues commands or often says you “must” or “have to” do something.
• Pejorative language: Your partner addresses or describes you with insulting names or adjectives, such as “stupid” or “idiotic.”
• Threats: 如果你不遵从他们的意愿，你的伴侣试图用“否则”的语句或消极的后果来控制你. Your partner might threaten you with physical, emotional, or verbal abuse.

Physical Abuse

• Violence: Your partner uses unwanted and forceful contact. This can include anything from wrist grabs to strikes against your body.
• Threatening body language: Your partner uses forceful movements, such as lunging toward you, glaring at you, or aggressively invading your personal space.
• Damaging property: 你的伴侣发脾气了，弄坏了家里的东西，比如打碎了盘子.
• Violence during sex: Your partner is extremely forceful or even violent during sex.

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• Know your alcohol limits: 在针对大学生的性侵犯案件中，超过一半涉及酒精(http://www.collegedrinkingprevention.gov/supportingresearch/journal/journalstudiesalcohol.aspx), according to researchers at Wayne State University. 醉酒会削弱你的判断力或抑制你抵抗攻击者的身体能力，从而使你明显更容易受到攻击. Binge drinkers are at a particularly high-risk of suffering incapacitation, blackout or unconsciousness.
• Watch your drinks: Take your drink to the restroom with you. 永远不要喝别人给你的饮料或从公共酒精来源(如潘趣酒碗)拿的饮料。.
• Trust your gut: If you get a bad feeling about a location or a person, leave immediately. 我们经常下意识地处理身体语言和其他危险信号，而没有意识到这一点. If something feels very wrong or you feel pursued, head in the direction of the nearest crowd, lighted area or building. Start talking loudly on your phone. Many attackers are unwilling to pursue victims who are aggressive or loud, which draws attention to the crime.
• Stick with your friends: Attend social gatherings with a group of friends that you trust. Look out for each other and help each other arrive home safely. If you do go out alone, 总是告诉别人你要去哪里，避免在城市或校园里没有灯光或没有交通的地方行走.

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如果你已经发现你的伴侣表现出上面列出的控制或攻击行为，而你太害怕在你们的关系中安全地提出这些问题, it’s time to get help. Victims often realize the dangers of their situation after it’s too late; the dynamic between the abuser and abused is strategically created to discourage the victims to acknowledge or address the problem.

Intimate partner abuse and violence is never okay. 它比你想象的要普遍得多，你完全有能力和权利安全离开.

• Contact a campus counselor or a support hotline: If you’re unsure how to get away from an abusive partner, contact the Campus Counseling Center located in the O. W. Reily Student Health Center. Their phone number is (662) 846-4690. You can also contact a support hotline for assistance. Love Is Respect (http://www.loveisrespect.org/for-yourself/contact-us/) and the National Domestic Abuse Hotline (http://www.thehotline.org/) both provide 24/7 phone assistance.
• Try not to blame yourself: Self-blame is extremely common in abusive relationships. It can be easy to feel trapped in your situation. However, 你伴侣的虐待行为绝对不是你的错，也不是你软弱的表现. Keep this in mind as you seek help.
• List safe places: Know where you can go in case you need to get away from an abusive partner. This might include the Campus Counseling Center, a trusted friends’ dorm room, a survivors’ shelter, or a residence hall staff office.
• Document hostile communications: 保存伴侣发来的威胁信息在情感上可能会很痛苦. However, voice messages, emails, IMs, 当你与顾问或权威人士交谈时，其他敌对的交流对证明你被侵犯的历史非常有用.
• Get counseling: The Campus Counseling Center is located in the O. W. Reily Student Health Center. Their phone number is (662) 846-4690. 现场咨询师经过培训，可以帮助处理人际关系攻击和家庭暴力. Deidra Byas, the Title IX Coordinator (662) 846-4690, or Mr. Michael Lipford, 学生发展主任(662)846-4667也可以帮助您寻求咨询服务.
• Call the police: If you are being threatened with assault, attempt to reach a safe place and call the police immediately. The contact for the DSU Police Department is (662) 846-4155. The contact for the Cleveland Police Department is (662) 843-3611.

• Help the victim reach a safe location away from the assailant. Make the victim feel as safe and listened to as possible.
• Many victims blame themselves for an attack. Inform the victim that the sexual assault was not their fault.
• Be a supportive listener. Thank the victim for telling you about this. Avoid phrases that evoke powerlessness at first, including “I’m sorry.”
• If you saw the attacker or witnessed any part of the assault, take detailed notes regarding the incident.
• Encourage the victim to contact the University Police Department, The Title IX Coordinator, the Director of Student Development, or the University Health Center.
• 陪同受害者去医院，并确保他们与专门研究性侵犯创伤的医疗专业人员会面.
• Follow up with the victim. Encourage participation in counseling sessions and support groups.

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